


A Typical Saturday Night

by crucifics



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Alcohol, Confused sexuality, F/M, M/M, Spin the Bottle, Strip Poker, Truth or Dare, and learn a lot about themselves, basically the freelancers have a bonding night, everyone is low key bi, lap dance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-19
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-06-09 09:35:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6900598
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crucifics/pseuds/crucifics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Freelancers are only trying to relax after a long day, but York is having none of it. After a lot of pleading and even more drinks, he finally convinces the group to engage in some...recreational activities. </p><p>Antics ensue, and no one's sexuality is safe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Typical Saturday Night

It was a typical Saturday night. The Freelancers were lounging in the rec room, relaxing after a hard week of training: all except Tex, South, Wyoming, and Florida, who were out on a recovery mission. Wash was dozing on one of the couches, while York and North debated whether or not to draw a moustache on his face. CT was reading a book, trying to drown out the conversation Maine and Carolina were having. It looked like it would stay a typical Saturday night.

That is, until York got an idea. He moved away from North, completely forgetting about Wash, and went to the mini-fridge in the corner. He grabbed several beers, holding them all in his arms. As he began passing them out, Carolina gave him a confused look.

“What are you doing, York?” She took the bottle he offered her.

“Well, the mood is a little dead in here, and I thought it would be fun if we all got a little bit tipsy.”

Wash, who had been shaken awake by York, looked at his beer skeptically. “Are you sure this is a good idea? The Director might spring a surprise training session on us tomorrow.”

York grinned at him. “Oh, lighten up, Wash. I just realized I’ve never seen you drunk.”

“There’s a reason for that…” he muttered.

“How old are you, anyway?” asked North, turning around from his spot in front of the couch to face him.

“Twenty-four,” Wash said quietly.

York gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “It’ll be okay, buddy. We’ll take good care of you.”

Wash glowered at him, ripping off the cap of the bottle with his teeth. He spat it out and took a sip, completely ruining the bad-ass image he had just created when he nearly gagged on the beer. He pulled the bottle away and looked at it in disgust. “This is so bitter!”

North laughed. “Yeah, we’ll take real good care of you.”

It didn’t take very long for everyone to get tipsy, especially when York kept a bottle in everyone’s hand at all times. No one was relaxed anymore. Instead, North had put on some music, and York and Carolina had taken the floor, much to everyone else’s disgust and begrudging admiration.

Wash noticed that Maine was watching Carolina appreciatively. He pointed it out to CT, who just shrugged, taking another swallow of beer.

Suddenly, the music quieted. York had his hand on the knob of the stereo, a smile on his face. “I just had a great idea,” he said. “We should play poker.”

CT rolled her eyes. “This again? You try to make us play every week.”

“That’s because it would be great! Come on, guys, what do you say?” His eyes were pleading.

North shrugged. “I would be okay with that.”

Maine gave an apathetic grunt.

York looked at CT expectantly. “Whatever,” she grumbled.

“I’m in,” said Wash.

York turned to Carolina. He made a puppy face at her.

She glowered at him. “Fine.”

He grinned. “It’s settled then! Everyone have a seat, I’ll deal.”

Once everyone was seated and dealt, York clapped his hands together. “Okay. Does everyone here know how to play?”

Washington tentatively raised his hand. “I don’t.”

Maine shrugged. “Somewhat.”

“Hm. Well, I actually don’t really want to explain. You guys will get the hang of it.” A wicked grin came over his face. “Oh, did I forget to mention something? We’re going to be playing strip poker.”

A collective groan broke out.

Carolina glared at him. “I did not agree to this.”

“Come on, baby, lighten up a little bit. We don’t have to go full nude. Just spice up the game a little!”

“I’m down,” said Wash.

York stared at him incredulously. “Really? Wow, I expected to have to convince you.” He turned to Carolina. “Come on, Caro. If Wash is doing it, you have to.”

She stared at him for a long time. “Fine. But we’re going nude. I’m going to kick your bare, pink little ass.”

North whistled. “Sounds like you’re going to have your hands full, York.”

“If I’m lucky,” he quipped.

Carolina punched him on the arm.

Three rounds later, and only Wash and York had had to remove any clothing. Wash because he just wasn’t very good. York because he always wanted to raise Carolina, only for her to have a stronger hand.

Washington had lost a sock, York lost both.

“Well this is exciting,” muttered CT.

North shrugged. “I imagine we’ll see some real skin here, soon.”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you, North?” said Wash, smirking.

York guffawed. “Let’s get Wash drunk more often! This is great!” He shoved some of his remaining chips towards the center and took another swallow of beer.

Maine said nothing, just pushed all of his chips into the pot.

North blinked, letting out a low whistle. “That’s a bold move, Maine. I’m gonna fold.” He threw his cards down.

Carolina quirked an eyebrow. She smiled threateningly at Maine. “I’m all in, too.”

Wash and CT, followed quickly by York, folded.

“What’s it going to be, Maine?” asked Carolina softly, her eyes daring him.

Maine gave her a rare smirk. He showed them his cards.

York burst out laughing. “He got a straight flush!”

Carolina growled, throwing her cards down. “I had a full house. Fuck.”

“Time to take off your socks, Caro,” he said, grinning at her.

She glared at him. “I’m not wearing socks, York-o.” She peeled off her tank top, revealing a pale blue bra. Carolina gave everyone a hard stare, daring them to say something.

Maine just leaned back in his chair, folding his hands behind his head. He winked at her.

She turned pink.

The game continued, until everyone had lost some clothes. Wash and York were down to their boxers, Maine had lost his shirt, and North had decided to take off his sweatpants instead of his tank top. Carolina was shirtless, CT was pantsless.

Stupidly, York had decided to push Maine for another round. When he inevitably lost, everyone looked at him expectantly.

York spluttered. “Oh, come on you guys, you aren’t really going to make me do it, are you?”

“Strip.” Carolina’s voice was merciless.

“I have a better idea,” he said, clearly scrambling. “Why don’t we play spin the bottle? We have plenty lying around.” He downed his beer and waved it in the air to make his point.

North sighed. “Come on, you guys. Leave the poor man alone. We can play spin the bottle.”

“What do you mean, ‘poor man?’” asked CT incredulously. “He’s the one who started this stupid thing, the least he could do is finish it.”

York grabbed the bottle and ran over to the area in front of the couches. “Fuck you guys, I’m playing spin the bottle!”

Begrudgingly, everyone joined him, muttering under their breath.

York grinned, placing the bottle in the center. “Alright. Who wants to go first?”

Everyone looked at him.

He sighed. “You guys suck. Fine. I’ll go.” He spun it, mouthing a name to himself. No one had to read his lips to know what he was saying.

The bottle, however, had its own agenda. “North?” he said, his voice rising two octaves.

“No need to sound so disappointed,” muttered North. He scooted into the center of the circle. “Shall we?”

York shook himself. “Uh, I guess.” He crawled into the center and looked at his best friend hesitantly. “How do you want to…”

North leaned forward and connected their lips. At first, York was too shocked and embarrassed to do anything, but at North’s gentle insistence, he kissed back.

Carolina was practically cackling. “This is amazing.”

They pulled away, slightly pinker than before, both sitting back in their original spots.

“I guess it’s my turn, then,” said North. He spun the bottle. It landed on CT.

CT began to blush, though she would have hotly denied it if you had told her that. She moved over to North and held her breath as he leaned in, pressing his mouth to hers. It was soft and sweet. When he pulled away, she realized she was light-headed. She ignored everyone’s slightly surprised-looking stares, and North’s contemplative one, and gave the bottle a hard spin.

It landed on Washington.

His mouth fell open a little bit. He quickly cleared his throat, moving to the center of the circle. “Alrighty then,” he said, shockingly gung-ho about the situation. He took CT’s face in his hands and began kissing her. It wasn’t particularly graceful, but even Carolina felt something akin to jealousy at watching CT’s face after they were done.

She glared. “My turn,” she said, pushing Wash out of the way. She grabbed the bottle and gave it a hard spin. Everyone held their breath as it slowed to a stop.

Maine.

He smirked.

Carolina’s expression was almost exasperated. “You don’t have to look so excited about it. Get over here.”

He did as he was bid, the smirk on his face disappearing for a much more intense expression. He grabbed her hips and pulled her close.

Carolina barely had time to react before his lips were devouring hers, and it was all she could do not to gasp. His tongue probed her mouth, running along her bottom lip, before he caught it in his teeth. Their teeth scraped, but instead of being irritated by it, she was only that much more turned on. Before she could stop it, a small moan escaped her.

Suddenly, York was pulling them apart. “Okay, okay, that’s enough. The object of the game is to kiss someone, not eat them,” he said, his tone almost hurt.

“I wish,” muttered Maine, sitting back down.

“Okay, then,” Wash interjected quickly. “I recall being robbed of a turn, so if you guys don’t mind, I’ll just do a quick spin.”

When it landed, he blinked. “Um, can I go again?”

“Oh, come on, you big baby. Don’t you want to moan like Carolina?” Maine grinned and moved back into the center of the circle.

Carolina and York glared at him.

Wash swallowed hard. Normally, he would have put up a fight, but the alcohol was making him remarkably more…adventurous. He heaved a big sigh and crawled into the middle. “Fine, but you should know--”

Maine captured his mouth much the same that he had with Carolina’s, though he was considerably rougher with Wash. He actually drew blood from the other’s lower lip, but Wash didn’t seem to mind. Maine forced his mouth open and pushed his tongue inside. When they showed no signs of breaking apart, Carolina cleared her throat.

Maine gave Wash one more nip before letting him go. He winked at Carolina as he lay down on his spot, leaving a confused and semi-hard Washington still in the center.

Wash returned to his spot on the carpet and drew his knees up to his chest, wiping his slightly swollen lips off with the back of his hand. He stared at the ground, his eyes wide.

North coughed uncomfortably. “Are you going to spin, Maine?”

He shrugged. “I’m good.”

Carolina rolled her eyes. “Whatever. I’ll go again.”

York was going to object, when he saw the bottle pointing at him. He grinned. “Alright!”

It was Maine’s turn to roll his eyes.

Their kiss was long and almost sickeningly sweet. Where Maine was rough and passionate, York was gentle and slow. Carolina never moaned, but when they broke apart, her face was uncharacteristically soft.

Wash cleared his throat. “Well, that was…interesting. How about a game of truth or dare?”

York, who had his arm around Carolina’s shoulders, pointed at Washington. “I like the way you think.”

Maine stood. “I’ll pass.” He walked past Carolina, ruffling her hair affectionately.

She took his hand in hers and squeezed it, letting him know they were okay.

“Good night, everyone,” he said, walking away.

They all muttered back at him, even York. When he was gone, York clapped his hands. “Since it was Washington’s idea, I vote he goes first. Truth or dare, Wash?”

He sighed. “I’m an idiot. Truth.”

“Hm…Okay. If you could fuck any of us, doesn’t have to be in this room, who would it be?”

Washington gave him an exasperated look. “Seriously? Fuck. Okay. Let’s see…”

“I won’t be offended if you don’t say me,” he joked.

“If I say who, do you promise not to tell them? Slash promise not to tell anyone?”

Everyone gave him some kind of affirmation.

“Maine,” he said candidly.

CT laughed. “Fuck, dude.”

Carolina shrugged. “Can you blame him?”

York stopped laughing. “Okay, okay. Your turn, Wash. Pick someone to ask.”

He thought for a moment. “North: truth or dare?”

North sighed. “How did you know to pick me? Alright, alright. I’ll have to think…” He sighed again. “Okay, fine. Give me truth.”

“Pussy,” York muttered.

Wash scratched his leg, thinking. “Um…Okay. I got it. What’s the most embarrassing thing anyone has ever seen you do?”

“Oh, that one’s easy. I was sixteen, and back then, I didn’t exactly have girls lining up at the door to sleep with me. So, I got by with other things…I saw online that grapefruits make good substitutes for…well…” He waved his hands vaguely. “You know. I’m not proud of it, but I was even less proud of it when South walked in on me.”

“Oh, shit,” said CT, her hand flying to her mouth.

“Yeah, that was about my reaction. She actually got mad at me. Said I had forever ruined grapefruits for her. I don’t really like them anymore either. I just see one and get embarrassed.”

Carolina sniggered. “That one was probably deserved.”

“Probably,” he said amiably. “Anyway. How about you, Connie? Truth or dare?”

“Dare,” she said immediately.

“Alright, I see how it is. I dare you to…put an ice cube in your underwear until it melts.”

York raised his eyebrows. “Wow, North, you thought of that one pretty quickly. Been thinking about that for a while?”

He shot him a look.

CT shrugged. “Whatever.” She stood up and went to the mini-fridge, pulling out an ice cube. She sat back down, and, never breaking eye contact with North, dropped the ice cube down the front of her panties. She shuddered, but other than that had no reaction.

North looked impressed.

CT turned to Carolina. “Truth or dare?”

“Dare,” she shot back.

“Give Wash a lap dance.”

“Done.”

“Woah woah woah, hold up a second,” began Wash, his voice almost frantic.

“Yeah, let’s not get hasty,” York said, trying in vain to pull Carolina back down as she stood up.

Carolina shook free of him and walked over to Wash. “You’re going to have to be higher up than that, Wash,” she said, her voice very calm.

He blinked, swallowing audibly. He stood, walking over to the couch, but was apparently going too slow for her. She pushed him back into the couch, giving him a little smirk. “Ready, Wash?”

“Do I have to?” he asked, shooting York an apologetic look.

She scowled. “Don’t sound so unhappy about it.” Before he could respond, she turned around, swaying her hips from side to side. She bent over and sprang back up, turning and giving him a wink. Carolina sauntered closer to him, her hands making small clawing gestures at the air. She put one hand on either side of him and dipped her face close to his crotch before quickly pulling up, her hips moving back and forth the entire time. She straddled his lap and put one hand on either side of the couch beside his head, letting her head fall back to expose her neck. Carolina ground against him a few times, before finally pulling away and going back to sit beside York.

Wash, for the second time that night, was left half-hard and utterly bewildered. He slowly made his way back to his spot.

Carolina smiled like nothing had happened. “Alright, York. Truth or dare?”

“You guys are fucking crazy. I’m doing truth.”

“Pussy,” muttered North.

“Hm…What’s the cheesiest way you’ve ever picked up a girl?”

He grinned at her. “Alright, get this. I was at a bar, right? And I see this beautiful young thing from across the room. So I go over to her, with my lighter out, and I’m about to make a joke, when she grabs it right out of my hand--”

There was a collective groan from everyone except Carolina.

“That’s it, I’m going to bed,” said CT, standing up.

“I think I’ll join you,” said North. “Well, I mean, not join you, just, you know, go to sleep.”

“Smooth,” muttered Wash. He stood and dressed. “I will too. Night, guys.”

The two lovebirds watched them leave.

York grinned. “Finally, they’re gone. Can you believe those guys?”

Carolina returned the grin and kissed him.

It was a fairly standard Saturday night for the Freelancers. As it turned out, the Director would indeed spring a surprise training session on them the next day. Just as he did every Sunday.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! I just found this in the depths of my computer and thought it was worth posting. If you'd like to follow my tumblr, it's savingprivatehaywood.tumblr.com. Have a lovely day! Comments and kudos are very much appreciated <3


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